On the outside, I try to project an image of having it all together. But underneath that, I'm kind of a disaster. Hence... the name of the site: GlossyVeneer. I seem to have lost my gratitude. I know it is the season of “thanks”, but I’m not feeling much of that right now. In fact, I’m downright grumpy.
We had Thanksgiving with friends and EVERY SINGLE DISH I contributed turned out like shit. My bread didn’t rise right, my sweet potato souffle never “popped” because communal oven temperatures kept changing, my cranberries were runnier than they should have been. I baked pies at the last minute and I was so disappointed in them. The store bought crusts were gross and our first attempt at making pecan pie was runny. The pecan pie was made AFTER I had already attempted to make pecan pie tartlets, a completely new recipe for me, and they just stuck in the pans. They had to be pried out and tossed. I felt embarrassed and sad that I had to share my cooking failures with friends, people who have never had my cooking before so their first impression was a bunch of crap.
My dishwasher is STILL broken. We were going to hit Black Friday sales to try finding a replacement. We’re sooooo not cut out for that kind of shopping. We didn’t want to wake up super super early, so we left the house around 7:00 AM. We found a great deal at Best Buy, but it was impossible to find someone to help us. Plus, we were a little hesitant about getting it without an installation option. We just don’t trust our handyman skills that much. Then we went to a different store, realized we’d pay about $100 more for the dishwasher and then an additional $100 for installation. So we decided to go with the Best Buy deal. But every Best Buy in the valley was sold out.
My husband has been out of town pretty much ALL THE TIME for his job lately. He will be out of town over the next couple weeks again on Monday. He’s spending most of the time this weekend working, especially now that the dishwasher shopping has failed. Because of his travel, I am responsible for getting my own Christmas presents. And shop for him, his family and my family. Maybe I’ll get to see him again at Christmas time for a couple days before he has to go work at various casinos to do their end-of-year counts. And then busy season will start and I’ll rarely see him. And when I do see him, I’ll be walking on eggshells because he’ll be so ornery about everything on his job that I will do everything in my power to avoid making his home life more stressful. But when I do that, I make my life more difficult.
I’m tired, I’m grumpy. I constantly have a headache. I have no coping skills right now, everything in life seems like it is an insurmountable challenge personally designed to beat me down.
Comments are off, I’m not asking for a pity party or anything. I just needed to vent.
